Extract from our forthcoming information sheet explaining why resilience is important and helpful steps you can take to achieve it.
Below is an extract from the above information sheet, which we featured in one of our Challenge newsletters Winter/Spring 2021: Consistency in uncertain times.
For many family members their role as carer is not just around providing support for their loved one. Family carers often become informal care managers who coordinate care and support across multiple settings and providers. As the demands of this role increase so does the risk of stress, burnout, decline in own health and the ability to fulfil other roles.
The term resilience has often been used to describe people’s behaviour in response to a situation, for example: “Jake is coping well, he is very resilient.” However, ‘resilient’ is not something you are, or not, rather resilience is a much more of a dynamic ever-evolving process. Resilience is highly situation-related, meaning that a person who seems to cope in one situation may not function as well in another case.
Developing resilience is not about putting the onus on you to find ways to be able to cope with anything and to keep going whatever happens. Developing resilience is also about being able to identify and highlight where additional support and services are needed and to know who can help. You are the heartbeat of your family and can only look after others who depend on you if you look after yourself. You spend so much time looking after other people that you may forget yourself – but you are important too and deserve to be cared for as much as anyone else.
Looking after yourself is not being selfish; being aware of your own feelings and needs means that you will have greater resilience to carry on – the better you feel, the better you can help others to feel.
Remember resilience is a process.
Here are some steps which may be helpful.
Keep a focus on:
Adapted from Cranfield Trust’s webinar: Managing Resilience in Difficult Times: www.cranfieldtrust.org
Do not be afraid to ask for help; many family carers will be feeling the same way as you and asking for help, and looking after your own needs is a strength, not a weakness. Reaching out and taking the help that is there for you is the best way to look after the people who matter to you. Notice who is reliably there for you to listen and offer practical support.
Soldiering on alone can lead to longer term stress, which, if ignored, can result in burnout.
The CBF have developed a resource for families about the impact of caring and the support available for family carers.
Find out more about the resource here.
You can also find out how to access support with a carers assessment here.
The CBF has a series of family podcasts “Challenge Accepted” featuring family perspectives on connecting with others, taking time to yourself, spending time together as a family, accessing carers assessments and holidays.
Find out more about the podcasts here.
The CBF is also now offering free peer support for family carers. These include Carer’s Catch Ups over Zoom, Listening Ear Calls, a private Facebook group, and the family carer’s email network.
Find out more about the range of ways that family carers can connect here.
Our Family Support Service provides free assistance to family carers. We offer confidential, non-judgmental support and information tailored to the needs of your family members with severe learning disabilities.
You can get in touch by email: support@thecbf.org.uk or telephone: 0300 666 0126
Find out more about the family support services here.
Caring for a relative with severe learning disabilities can have a huge effect on your life, leaving you with little time and energy for your own life and wellbeing. Read our quick read guide on the impact of caring on families with a complete information sheet available to download.
Read about the experiences of other family carers in this series of articles written by family members themselves.
The Family Support Service can provide information and support about the needs of your family member with a severe learning disability. Our support is confidential, and we won’t judge you or tell you what to do.
